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I'm still trying to figure out this blogging thing. So far, I think this is the lamest attempt at blogging in the history of the web. I have been reading some really great blogs that have been inspiring, motivating, and given me a sense of comradery with other women who are struggling with some of the same issues. Even in my secluded little world, I now know that I'm not alone.
I also feel insecure in my inferior little blog, with no readers, and no bells and whistles. I hope that will change.
So, for those reading, if and when you read, I give you this thought.... You always here the saying "There's one on every family." If you can look at your family and think everyone is normal, chance are you are that "one." Apparently I am that one. (Which is scary if you know my family)
I went to another new therapist. I think I'll like her. The most reassuring thing was that she didn't try to push a diet on me right away. She actually wants to help me through the issues behind the eating. As Lewis Carol wrote, "Begin with the begining..." Which is what we are going to do. I have to deal with the depression and then tackle my relationship with food. I already feel better after speaking with Susan. She made me feel like there is hope, which is something I've been missing. I'm a little less scared of facing my deamons than I was yesterday.
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2 comments:
I was wondering where you'd gotten to... and I am glad to see that you are still blogging. This is hard work, changing our lives, but it sounds like you are really committed to making a change.
A thought about your "one in every family" idea... maybe there is one in every family. And maybe that "one" is the uniquely gifted one who hasn't yet discovered all that she has to offer. Discover yourself and enjoy the journey along the way.
I admire your bravery.
I totally understand where's you're coming from. Almost every single day I have a moment (or moments) where I feel the overwhelming urge to just get away. To dissolve into a plate of food while curled up on the sofa. I just had one of these moments. I was considering just leaving work early and going to that sofa and escaping all these negative feelings when I stumbled across your blog.
Thank you for reminding me why I feel this way, and why i DO NOT have to repeat this pattern. At least not today. I look back at the string of days I've managed to accrue where I've managed to ease off the food crutch, and I get strength. I don't know what tomorrow will feel like, but at least today I've managed to get through this.
You're not alone in your struggles.
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